Thursday, April 9, 2009

Sonuvabitch!

So ...

Here I am, living my goddamn life, and this tall, overweight motherfucker from Canada who knows me for one reason, and that reason is because someone was once taken in by him and introduced him to me ... So ...

So.

So, anyway, Bobby wants to go out tonight. So ...

So.

So we do.

And so this motherfucker comes into the Golden Lantern with his psycho boyfriend and starts to have one helluva gay old time before he sees me and starts in to whispering sweet nothings about me to the boyfriend as they both flagrantly begin to stare at me across the bar and giggle and all whatnot ...

So ...

So, eventually, tall, heavyset motherfucker from Canada comes around the bar to talk to me, leans in close ... like, real close to my ear ... to tell me, hey, stay cool, cause I just recently told my new boyfriend - yeah, him, over there - that you and I went to this hot-tub party a couple of weeks ago ... no, I know it wasn't you, but I'm using you as my alibi, so back me up, okay? Okay, dude?

Like ... um ...

No, motherfucker!

No!

I don't even know your fuckin' name, although you obviously know mine - but, dude, if you're gonna tell the psycho that you went with me cause you were taken with my big dick, then you need to know that the psycho has seen this equipment and knows, on his own, firsthand, more than you.

So ... you, my friend, don't belong in public. Go away and find a rock - under which to crawl ...

... And die and rot.

What the hell is going on in this world?

Huh?

So.

3 comments:

  1. What the hell is going on is that the tall, overweight motherfucker from Canada is a total prick. Total.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I just can't believe someone who doesn't know me that well would tell such a complicated lie. Spend some time with me first, then you'd know I don't do hot-tub parties!

    ReplyDelete
  3. The guy sounds like a complete wanker, unworthy of any sort of "alibi" you might be able to give him.

    ReplyDelete

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